But then I'm still overwhelmed by the need to call to check in, to say I Love You and mean it, to create surprises and treats and rewards. I brought home a slinky yesterday from the drug store where I stopped to get cat food late at night when I had to get up at 3:30 in the morning because I knew he wouldn't and kept whining at me to do it. So I'm annoyed and tired and grumpy about this silly errand, but then I see the Slinky and know that it will make him so happy if I bring it home...
I'm either finally getting comfortable enough in my own skin to assert myself, or I'm looking for reasons to drive him away and excuses to make a seemingly inevitable break up make more sense.