Jul. 16, 2004

Crazy Making

He's making me crazy! Little things are setting me off (iPod programing, analyzing my party skills, pampering the cat) making me want to put him in his place, stop talking to him, tell him I'm right and he's wrong, true or not.

But then I'm still overwhelmed by the need to call to check in, to say I Love You and mean it, to create surprises and treats and rewards. I brought home a slinky yesterday from the drug store where I stopped to get cat food late at night when I had to get up at 3:30 in the morning because I knew he wouldn't and kept whining at me to do it. So I'm annoyed and tired and grumpy about this silly errand, but then I see the Slinky and know that it will make him so happy if I bring it home...

I'm either finally getting comfortable enough in my own skin to assert myself, or I'm looking for reasons to drive him away and excuses to make a seemingly inevitable break up make more sense.

Rachel fluttered @ 12:39 am